Thatha sets a new record in train journey ; yeshwantpur kamakhya super fast expres

Thatha was very keen to do a train journey from Kolkatta to Guwahati. I pooh poohed it on a few earlier occasions. Time was a scarce commodity with appa and amma being not well and a tiny baby amidst us. But then he kept his penchant for train travel alive.

A few weeks back  D  told us one fine day that  Bunchin is starting to forget thatha and patti and so  plan a visit soon. This time thatha did not consult with me, but went ahead and booked a train journey all the way from Chennai to Guwahati. I just could not believe it, that he is actually planning to travel 46 hours by train. Other options are available and still he chooses to be in a train for two full days. I was chastened that it is a wait listed ticket and believed that it is likely to be not confirmed. So I did not give it much thought. Even the previous day it was remaining steadfast in the same WL 4 position. But on the day of the journey it got confirmed and he got ready and packed and left for Guwahati.

Nobody in our circle of friends and family could believe that he is doing this journey out of choice. Wont he feel bored is the common question all of them had asked me. Even his colleagues in office were quite surprised and asked him the same question. But he had made up his mind.He told them I have not travelled by train in the eastern part of the country, so looking forward to it.

He had reserved in an ac I class compartment and there was a family travelling alongwith him. A thatha, patti, daughter and granddaughter. When I heard this, I thought how nice, thathas travelling together. But then it appears that the thathas did not exchange a single word throughout the 48 hours!That is something of a record, which I could well believe that our thatha is capable of. But now we know there is one more of the same ! It is possible that they believed that the compartment for four would only have them and the fourth berth would be empty all the way. But then it was not to be, so they could have been  sulking!

Thatha was happy to do sudoku and pass his time quite comfortably. He was also browsing the net on his tablet, upto Orissa. Once into Didi territory, the net connectivity simply gave up. It did not return till he got back home in Guwahati. The last day of the journey at 5 am at  New Jalpaiguri station the next compartment emptied itself out.So thatha went and made himself comfortable there. He was happy to watch the scenery from the window seat. It was green green green all around and where theat re was no greenery, it was full of water. It had also started to rain. Watching the rain is thatha's favourite hobby. He did not feel bored at all, he says.

This is Yeshwantpur kamakhya superfast express and started operation in nov 2014. Food from the pantry was quite good. Only drawback was they do not serve roti with the meals and of  course no curd! Well maintained western toilets are also available.

All in all a very comfortable 'me alone' time and the only missing joy was a hot water bath. D had kept hot water ready as soon as thatha reached home. And after that it was bliss!

Thatha need not worry.This record of 47 (it was late by an hour) hours single train journey, will remain unbeaten for sometime to come!

Door delivery!

Had an interesting time shifting three boxes from home to a different location. Last night S and me tried to lift a heavy battery which was sitting on one of the boxes. We could not even move it an inch. We tried to think through the problem and took some time out and came out with many strategies. But no luck. So left it for the packers and movers due the next day.

Next day morning arrived and there was this phone call that he is near our house and can we come out for him to identify us. We came out and could not spot any vehicle. But then soon he was near us and called out! a puny 45kg man in a 'meen body" vandi. For those of you not familiar with this chennai terminology, it is a open plank with a height of six inches mounted on cyclerickshaw wheels and seat for the driver and having a motor cycle engine fitted underneath the plank. (It is highly dangerous on the roads, travels with breakneck speed, with no known brake system with a few bulky fisherwomen sitting on the sides and lots of that day's catch of fish for company)

Our next wonder was how would this person carry the three boxes. He did it without batting an eyelid. He removed the heavy battery by just leveraging it a bit and smoothly sliding it over a stool we had kept nearby.A bit more heave and job done. A very chastening experience for both of us. But then we told ourselves that it is not how heavy you are but the skill and experience that is relevant here. Oh my!

He put the three boxes on the plank and cooly unravelled some ropes and tied them securely. My friend was checking with him if he has correct  address where this has to be delivered. He said yes, "naan dan avarku vandi otaren, adunala veedu teriyum( I drive his vehicle so I know their house). I asked him 'enna vandi". He said proudly showing his 'meen body vandi". Ha ha ha!

I do door delivery madam he added as a parting shot. I said what? He said kadailerundu  doors deliver pannanm illaya(I have to deliver the doors from the shop).

So he was doing door delivery of  doors!

Long live," door delivery meen body vandi aalu""!!

Bunchin diaries- Guwahati - language lab

In my previous avtar, I was in my company's training facility. I used to design courses for officers in desk jobs and also for employees in  sales function. Personality improvement sessions used to be a big hit with the trainees. Communication was one of the subjects and a hot favourite with me. I used to devour books which make such a simple subject(so I thought then) so varied and versatile a topic for study.

Trainees were given examples of communication techniques: speech, tone, eye contact, body language and gestures and ease of manner. These in totality make for an effective communication. Bunchin is a classic communication study in all its totality!He is able to pretty much  understand all that we tell him as I had mentioned in my earlier post.He is slowly catching up on communicating what he wants to say to others. He is all the time at work in his language lab, polishing his words. Yesterday he came up with 'anna'.It was so sweet to hear, it just popped up quite suddenly. I asked  D now he can say anna, who is his anna. She said two of her friends who have boys a little older than him, already call him their younger brother 'thambiya'.So he can now call them anna right royally.

He is gesturing with his hands all that he wants to say for which he is yet to find the words. He wants to say the train thatha is coming in is very big.So he stretches his hands wide and for good effect also rotates them His eyes widen and his face sports a huge grin. You dont have any doubt that he means BIG really BIG. He wants to have milk and just shows the bottle and when D comprehends and gives him his milk, he is so totally surprised and happy that he communicated something and mommy understood and acted immediately. D says that was a tough one and I cleared !!

He is trying to put his tongue out and get some words, la la la , for a start.

Adhi is his staple word. It could be a ball, it could be a toy. It is like a joker in a card game It can be fitted where a correct word is not available. To be charitable to the tiny kiddo  he is not propounding some abstract concept, but pointing to a ball and saying 'adhi'. So that should be easy to crack !

He saw his chinna patti on googletalk yesterday. He has been saying 'thi' to me for many days now. He know she is also 'thi'. But he said tha tha. There is a story behind this which he is trying to tell her. He got to say thatha while in chennai, but he was not getting patti. So my sister used to tell him say patti. He would say thatha and have a nice smile on his face. She would make it a game and keep repeating say patti and he would say thatha. This went on for an entire car ride to tambaram one afternoon.. He is now telling her by just saying tha tha, that he remembers that gamei. In fact he could also be telling her that he is quite game for that particular 'game' once more. Brevity the soul of wit!

D says he is on the brink of exploding into all sorts of sounds and words.She can see it all gurgling and bursting to come out!

Will make for another post, friends!

Paramparca - the turkish serial

I would share interesting titbits of the serial on tuesday evenings with family. Last week while narrating it stuck me, that I could do a compare and contrast to the serials back home. So here we go

Outdoor locations are a major part of the serial and they are breathtakingly beautiful. More so, as I have a soft corner for Turkey and Istanbul and plan to visit someday.

The actors are very very handsome and stylishly dressed. The dresses reflect the changing seasons,  thank god. Minimal accessories, come to think of it, they have really no need for them. Very western if you ask me, but with a touch of the orient. And they blend seamlessly.

The background score is very apt and soothing . No jarring noises for some climax scenes and  no sad violin music, thank you.

Many a shoot has happend while the actors are driving, so you get to see the beautiful roads, shops and scenery or they are in some restaurant and you get to take in the decor and the varied food that is served. There is fresh fruit and vegetables and greens and salads forming a great part of any meal, be it upmarket or lower middle class household. Huge breads of various shapes are the staple food. Takeaways are like any other place, some stuffing inside a loaf of bread and you wrap in a tissue and keep chugging at it.

They seem to relish taking photos on their mobiles and posting it online. All the youngsters are going about with a tablet in their hand! Any breaking news event is usually some unknown camera taking a picture and posting it for all to see. Sleazy!

The colleges are not the huge structures that we see here, but look more like malls!

Except very old women from hinterland, everyone else wears western clothes.

There are lots and lots of hospital scenes.Very familiar to what we have here. But then the hospitals are very upmarket and pleasing to the eye, almost like star hotels. The actors get shot, they have grave accidents and fall down in their car into a ravine and after a few shots of the ambulance and hospital scene,they look very fresh and life goes on as usual. But then the lead actor and actress have a disagreement(in real life) , so the lady has to be bumped off. A stray bullet which was aimed at somebody else, hits her and she dies instantaneously! Being a veteran of 58 episodes and 2 hours each I believed  that the lead lady would come back alive. No, next shot was the burial scene! Even then I refused to believe she is dead, I thought a bad dream or wishful thinking  by some low ruffian in the serial wishing to see her harmed. No, she is buried alright and is remaining there for the last 5 episodes. Instead of the photo on the wall with a garland, it is her tombstone which is shown every now and then to drive home the point. This is the change.

But then they are desperate to add zing to the serial by adding new characters, none of them collectively are able to come anywhere near the lead lady, whom they bumped off.A new romance angle is with a psychiatrist and the hero. Not half as interesting. And unnecessary old ladies are imported from hinterland and asked to play roles which does not have any depth.

They seem to go in and out of prisons. The police appear to be very hep and efficient. As soon as somebody slaps somebody on the road, the police arrive and quickly take away the culprits. The police stations are very modern and policemen very professionally attired. The culprits are treated as persons and they sit across and talk normally. One of the actors, a hot headed fellow makes it a habit to make a prison sentence a routine thing. His life inside is quite fine and when he gets out, he has a job waiting for him as a mechanic in a car service shop owned by his friend. I dont understand the language, but the body language shows he has picked up his life just where he left off!

Women enjoy as good a status as men.They are shown as leading lady in a board room set up. They are lawyers, doctors and beauticians. One of them drove a taxi also.  It appears to me that women dont get to spend much time in the kitchen, preparation time appears to be less. Of course except for the grandfather who likes to experiment in the kitchen, I have not seen any man do much of kitchen work.

I think throughout the world, Indians have the most complicated cooking system! It is my view not based on any information but that is how I have always felt, and this serial has not made me change my mind!

My latest fix - watching a turkish serial

Paramparca is the name of the Turkish serial I am addicted to now. Paramparca means 'broken pieces'. The plot revolves around two girls who got switched in the hospital at birth, as their mothers had similar names.Of course they are from totally different backgrounds.The truth is revealed when one of the girls has an accident and her blood group does not match with either of her parents. So the story unfolds tracing back to the hospital. It has completed 58 episodes each running for 2 hours, so there is a lot more story happening. But then this can wait. I will go back in time to how I came to see the first episode and get hooked on to it.

This was September 2015. I was in Guwahati and enjoying the grandma post. Time used to be fully packed with Bunchin, a very lively and active baby. There was one day when Bunchin was away with his parents and I had some time to kill. I logged on to youtube. My friend had recommended that I watch Madame Secretary a US serial. I was browsing for that title. While it was not possible to download that one, this turkish serial popped up. It also said with English subtitles. I immediately clicked on it and began watching. Found the first episode quite gripping and also visually very appealing. The cast were extremely handsome and production was very slick. I got to see Istanbul in all its splendour and wide canvas. I was hooked. Halfway through the serial D got back and was quite surprised that I was watching a Turkish serial. She peeped into the screeen and was also interested. So we watched the rest of the episode together. I filled her in on what she had missed. An interesting and simple story line, very good script and extremely addictive visuals.It runs for a full 120 minutes mind you and no advertisements. So each episode is like watching a movie.

Just as I had got hooked, the second episode onwards, has no english subtitle. It was already an ongoing serial, so I could get to watch the past episodes online. Each time I would wish there was English subtitle.Every episode would also have several viewers asking for english subtitles.So I believed that it is only a production issue, and will be aired soon. In the meanwhile this was star entertainment when I was free. When I was busy watching the serial, sometimes I would stop and look for online turkish english translation. It would happen  when I was more than usually keen to know the meaning of a key word.

This went on for a few months and by then I had done catch up and was in sync with their live broadcasts. It is broadcast on mondays.So I eagerly wait for tuesday morning, when it would be uploaded. My tuesday afternoons are booked!

But then the lead lady has to be shot on her wedding day and she died.After that they are trying every trick available to bring back the excitement the show brought in. Without any romance, a family drama gets a bit dragging. And she had a very strong screen presence.She comes from a very ordinary lower middle class family and the lead man is a business magnate, with palatial building on the seafront. The chemistry added the zing to the series. Now no zing, no excitement, only drag drag drag.

But the sponsors need not worry. I will be there, complaining but watching every series. It ends in June, thank god. I can actually switch to some other interesting series!

Anybody preventing me from doing it now!!

But before that I will give you interesting tit bits about the series.

                                                                                                                                        ---contd

For Bunchin language is only one of the tools

Bunchin is keen to talk on the phone. Only we need an interpreter. He is getting some words and for the others he has a complex system. For some words he just says the first letter. Again if he cannot pronounce the first letter like say,' ka' he will say ' tha' . And for some others he will say the last letter of the word. Again the same logic of for 'ti' he will say 'thi'.

So now you have got his grammer right.So I will tell you what he tells me on the phone and you guess what are the word or words.

thi thi thi  thi thi (this will go on for a while) D tells me he is also smiling widely when he is saying it. Got it! It is patti . He is smiling because, he is able to hear my voice and he is able to call me correctly and have a conversation.

Now for the next, this is a little tough.

thi    (and there is a gap)  and he says  tha. and he kept saying thi and with a gap tha  many times. Thinking he wants to watch some dance videos(thi tha thi for dance) dance videos were played. He was so frustrated he was bawling. D came and when she saw him saying it, she realised the context and said, he was speaking to patti on skype and now the connection got cut.So he is saying patti, kaanum(can't see)  for patti it is thi and for kaanum it is tha.Got it?

Now he is also getting mischievous. When he wants to draw D's attention, he says 'tha tha' with such a soft and sweet voice, that D turns to look at him ,saying thatha. He grins widely, as if to tell her, see I got you to turn to look at me!

He has a picture book, where on one page there are three bears sitting and having food and it is dark outside and there is a sliver of a moon visible from the window. D has shown the picture many a time and shows 'nila'. He is able to say nila, quite well. Then she says the three bears are having 'mum mum' (meaning food). He can say mum mum also quite well. Then she says they are 'karadi'.How will they make a noise? She answers it by saying 'gggrrrrh'.He likes that of course and imitates it.

So it happened that D showed him the moon from the balcony a few days back when some friends had come for a baking session with their kids. Bunchin looked at it and said nila and followed it with mum mum and Grrrrrh. The friends of course looked to D the interpreter. She told them that he is saying the moon is the mum mum and the bears have a eaten a bit of it as food. Just like singers add their own sangathis to any music, to add a personal touch, D added her own twist to his communication! Maybe he is actually thinking so, who knows?

He has become playful. Now he is able to play with other kids. Earlier he would have some toys to play and the other kid would have some other toys to play. As long as they dont fight over the same toys, the mothers are happy and catch up on some baby talk. But now he is actually able to play hide and seek with another child, by hiding behind the curtain folds! He continued this game with his amma and appa also yday.

He tries to say something and if D is able to make out what he is saying, he is just overjoyed. D says it is not possible to describe it, you have to come and see it in person. He understands almost everything that is told to him.

His comprehension of our language is superior to our comprehension of his language!
Kids learn faster than us!
It must be quite frustrating for Bunchin!

Bunchin's first picnic!

Bunchin is eating, sleeping and living um tak tak(train). He goes to the viewing point on the bridge definitely once during the day.But he is doing nama smaranam of um tak tak almost non stop. Each time he says um tak tak D has to give some information about the train.He cant have enough.

Thatha has been advocating that a visit to a nearby railway station will be a good progression. D was thinking about it. It happened that a friend of theirs also having a child of Bunchin's age had a similar notion to take her son to the rail station nearby.So they got together and planned for a picnic today.

Usually their sleep schedules and mother's other daily schedules do not synchronise. But today it did.So armed with a box full of fresh grapes and a water bottle, the two mothers and their toddlers marched out of the campus. It is a short distance to the rail station.They did the final lap from the bridge down to the station quite comfortably. The kids were excited and trying to put in words all the thoughts going in their heads. But vocabulary being limited, were gesticulating and making all sorts of sounds to their moms. After a while a passenger train trundled into the station quite leisurely. They were all eyes and kept seeing bogie after bogie without getting fatigued. The train stood in the station for a while and the mom's being the smart alecs that they are, used the time to feed them all the grapes that they had brought. Days are getting hot in Guwahati, so water was also consumed without any hassle while they were gaping at the passenger train.

They were as excited when the train hooted and slowly left the station. It is a very small station.They were told, no other train was expected in the next couple of hours.So the kids fooled around the place and were coaxed and coerced to get back home.

Bunchin is a person in a hurry and the other boy is a shy, retiring type. The mothers are good friends and wished that these two also bond together. This picnic sort of paved the way for a bridging the gap, so to say.

Bring on more picnics I say!

Appa, my teacher, guide and friend -- V women's day special

Appa really respected amma. I am tending to believe respect is a very sure foundation of a successful and stable marriage. And he continued in the same manner for 62 years of their marriage. He would consult her on every aspect of home management. When I was in school and college, we did not have a phone at home. So any communication has to be by post or meeting them in person. Every letter that used to come home, appa will share with amma and in the same way, when he is making out any letter, be it personal or professional, he will show it to amma and only after she approves, will he send it. I used to find it very charming then and I am finding it extremely charming now, when I think back. Any plan for an outing will be a joint decision.

We are two sisters and a brother. We never felt any discrimination being girls. Being a girl was never an issue. Except when we had gone out, we have to be back home by 6 pm. We never found it unreasonable for the simple reason, we lived in a campus and it was shrub land. It would get extremely dark and there were few street lights. My brother would come and ride his cycle with us if we got late on a rare occasion, from the rail station.

He never did any cooking or cutting vegetables or any other kitchen work. We had our aunt with us and she used to be helping amma out in the kitchen. But appa would pitch in hundred percent for all other jobs in the house. We had an estate, so there would be any number of jobs to do like to pick up the tamarind pods and then dehusk them and put them out to dry and then deseed them. Appa will see to it that all of us are gathered in a verandah and do a joint cooperative effort(he included) and enjoy lot of chatter and bonhomie along with that. We never felt any drudgery. We were not very keen to help out amma in the kitchen and he used to cajole us to go and help her.See, she is finding it difficult please go and help her would be his refrain many a time. He would also use the occasion to tell us, how he lost his mother when he was three, and we do not know to appreciate a loving mother.

We persued whatever branch of higher studies we wanted to pursue.He would always be there to give full support including applying for the forms, getting the postal orders and finally sending them by registered post.

Amma wanted to pursue higher studies when I was in college. Appa encouraged her and did the necessary research to find out the university offering pre university course through distance education. Amma would do the studying, and appa was her secretariat. He would collect her answer papers, parcel them and send them through post.Any correspondence from the university he will read it out to her and both of them will decide on the correct response and appa would draft the letter again for her approval. He would collect any extra reading that she might require from the college library.
She persued her undergraduation and post graduation and then a b ed degree is too well chronicled in family history to need repetion. She completed her b ed course and next year appa retired.Amma wanted to work in a school, so she did work for 5 years in a school in anna nagar and later adyar. Appa used to fondly pack her bag with a flask of tea and biscuits!He was so happy to be housebound and see amma off to work!

On this womens day week, I still remember the comfortable way he would potter around the house when amma was away at work, and wipe the vessels the maid has cleaned and arrange them neatly in the kitchen. This is a very relaxing job he told me once

Appa and summer holidays

Appa was a teacher. So summer holidays meant he would get correction of answer papers from the university. Our regular postman was a burly fellow with a huge hat. He would come home with large  packets in the rear carrier of his cycle. It would have a ghada cloth as covering, with lac sealing on all the four sides and neatly stitched together with a thread. He would be happy to deliver, as he believed he is doing a very important job and appa would give him some small amount as baksheesh.
(amma would remove the stitching neatly and the ghada cloth would be given to the dhobi for bleaching. They would be stitched together and used as first level pillow cover for the cotton pillows we used to make at home, or as duster cloth or napkin)

We had a good balcony which was quite airy with a neem tree just outside it.So summer was not as scorching as it is now. Appa would sit there in his bug proof chair and do the corrections. Correction work was turned into a cottage industry at home. He would do the corrections. After a bunch of it was over, he would ask one of us to tabulate the marks in the first page and do the totalling. We were also to check whether he has omitted any answer without giving any marks. We would do it with great excitement as we would compare, if our bunch of answer papers had good students or not.We would also read the  pleading footnotes that some students would write asking for appa's grace to make them pass.
I was not too comfortable in totalling, so used to stick to tabulation and my siblings used to be good at totalling.The totals has to be checked by another person at home and then appa will take it up for tabulating in a huge sheet the university would have sent with the roll numbers printed.  Then it will be amma's and appa's job to put it in a nice cover, again do the covering with a ghada cloth. I have helped in the sewing together of the parcel many a time. The final job of sealing with wax used to be very exciting.A candle used to be lit and wax sticks used to be held over the flame and had to be affixed when they are hot and gooey.If I remember right, appa would have a seal which has to be placed on them. Invariably appa would write the address of the university and the job is complete. He would carry it in his cycle to the post office in the campus and despatch it to the university. He would not delegate this job to anybody else.

Correction work would continue for over two months of summer,; different courses and different universities both undergraduate and post graduate exams papers would find their way home.

There would be a steady stream in the initial years of students who have taken the exam with their parents, coming home and giving their role number to appa, asking for appa's benevolence in making their ward pass the exam.Appa will receive them nicely and when they reach out with a slip of paper, he would tell them, if they are in the borderline, not to worry, he would himself give them grace marks to make them pass. But if they are not, sorry he would not be able to help them. They will linger for a while, some of them giving sad stories. But appa would repeat what he said.Then they would leave.

Later years, everyone knew about appa, so at best it used to be a trickle. We were taking board exams then, and believed the roll numbers are secret and were shocked that people are able to get the name and address of the examiner from the university.

Appa took his job as a teacher very dutifully. He would tell me, being a brahmin, teaching is my basic dharma and I am not to be paid for that. But times are different and I am a teacher and have to run my family with the salary they pay me.And the paper corrections are part and parcel of my responsibility as a teacher in this college. So I cannot refuse the monthly salary nor the remuneration for the correction work. But when students used to come for tuitions,he would tell them, I dont conduct tuitions, you can ask me any doubts in class or in the staff room. You can even come home to clarify any doubts, but I dont take tuitons. A few of his collegues in the college and elsewhere have looked at him as a 'pozhaika teriyadavan".
He would refuse any offer at any remuneration. We have seen many a student after learning some extra classses at home, bring a few apples and prostrate before him and seek his blessings. He would then tell us, my father would have refused even these apples, but I feel a few fruits as a token of thanksgiving is okay.

His father never used to tell the children why he is refusing even a few fruits. He thought this is how one should live. Times change and  appa thought it necessary to tell me why he does not give tuitions nor entertain people who seek his intervention in increasing the marks in the papers sent for .correction. Times have changed drastically now. My children see the way we live and also hear these stories of their thatha and kollu thatha. This is the continuity and family heirloom that we pass on.

Bunchin diary, fast forward to Guwahati II

Bunchin is adding new words to his vocabulary. Yesterday just like that he said 'hello' when D put a call through to me. She was holding the handset and said Bunchin wants to talk to you. He said hello. I was not sure it was not D who was trying to imitate his voice and prompt him to say hello. She said no, I actually had to talk to someone on the landline and I was just holding the phone near Bunchin's face. When the matter was clarified, then he said hello a few times more. I was excited and asked D why she had not told me that he is able to say hello.She said simple. He is saying hello now for the first time! So great!

He was carrying on a conversation with me saying, baba gum, tata, thatha. um tak tak tak , amma , mmm maa a pathi, thi thi thi and so on. I was answering him and in between I stopped so that I actually hear clearly what he is saying. Bunchin also stopped speaking, as he could not hear me say anything and was telling D, Patti tata. You get it right. He is telling her that patti has gone away and so I dont hear her voice. When Bunchin was in Madras, he used to want to talk to his father. When his father will say something to him. he will listen intently and not say anything.D would tell him, you keep quiet for sometime, so that Bunchin can say something.Taking that line, I had kept quiet for sometime, as he was holding forth. But see Bunchin's inference?

Bunchin was excited yesterday having tried a new slide in a bigger park. It was curved and he would go round and round twice before he is able to touch the ground. He went with his father. On coming home, he was super thrilled and wanted to communicate what he did to D. He waved his hands round and round and said he went for tata. and spread his hands wide. A very BIG tata. D says it was good fun.

D was telling me that he has become very cunning. Sometimes when he gets up in the middle of the night, quite wide awake and playful, he calls out to D, in a very honeyed voice, ammma, ammma and touches her cheeks gently to get her to wake up. She says I would not have believed he is capable of such sweetness in his voice. But while she was telling me this, she asked him, how he would say ammma in such a sweet fashion, please tell patti. He understood what she was saying alright, with a grin he was amma in a forceful way, which is demanding. She could not get him to mimic his midnight tone!

D allows to wallow in the sand pit and he throws the mud all over himself and lifts his shirt to show her see I have dirtied it so much!

He goes for walk and sits on a side walk and enjoys the surroundings, fooling around with the dried leaves.

Home is now only for eating and sleeping and barest minimum essentials. All other times are outdoor times. Now the weather is good, so it is somewhat fine. Next month will have rains and we shall see how Bunchin handles the situation!!!

Appa, my teacher, guide and friend - III

Appa studied in Kannada medium in Mysore. His second language was Sanskrit. He did not confine himself to just the text, but studied works of scholars like Vedanta desikar and understood their meaning fully. He used to quote Sanskrit phrases or slokas and Kannada sayings at appropriate times to drive home his point. Many of them have helped me to stay rooted.

"annam na nindhyaat  thath vratham'" was told to us when we were very small. Do not criticise food.This should be your value system. He used to impress on the key words. Thath vratham was what he used to impress upon. So it was not a simple, 'eat what is given to you, as food is sacred and has the effort of so many people'. It was given to us as a value system to make it part and parcel of our lives. Till today I have never found any food that is given to me worthy of being criticised badly and discarded. Even recently a friend was narrating an incident when we were in college. We had gone to a classmates house and they had served us upma. While my other two friends just could not even take a morsel as it was not palatable, I just quietly polished it off. I do remember vaguely that it was not very tasty. But 'annam n nindhyaat thath vratham' was already a part of me.

"Sarva dharman parithyajya maa mekam sharanam vraja
Aham tvam sarva papebyo moksha ishyami    maa suchaha"

This was saranagathi philosophy at the purest. It is what Krishna tells Arjuna in Bhagavad gita. 'Leave out all other beliefs, just take refuge in me. I will mitigate all your sins and give you moksha. Do not have any doubts. Appa used to give special emphasis on 'maa mekam"(only me) and ' maa suchaha' (do not have any doubts). I can, everytime I recite this sloka, hear the clear inflection of his voice when he  taught us these phrases with their meaning. It has helped me steady myself many a time when tossed by events which were a bit too much for me to handle at that time.

" sura sura sevitha paada pankaja kare viraja kamaneeya pustaka
virinchi pathni kamalasana priya, saraswathi nruthyathu vaachi me sada"

This is a sloka in praise of goddess Saraswathi. One of the first slokas he taught us. It is invocation to the goddess and after describing her, invokes on her to perennialy be dancing in whatever I speak. "saraswathi nruthyathu vaachi me sada". He used to give special emphasis on vaachi and sada. How would we be if we know forever that saraswathi is in our spoken word? We will be very careful of what we say. I used to recite this sloka before attending any interview or important presentation or meeting and it sure helped me to settle the butterflies in my stomach!

After a hearty meal that amma had served(which were quite a good number!) he would get up with the sweet words " anna dhata sukhi bhava!" Amma would feel good and would be quite keen to do a repeat performance. Such a pleasant ending to a homely meal and such good feeling for the person who has taken so much trouble all for love of the family.

Later when he was not so well and could not move out of the house, he would say good bye with the words, 'punaraagama nayacha' meaning, please come again.

I am now telling you appa,

 punaraagamanayacha!

Bunchin - a flash forward to Guwahati

D told me that she had taken Bunchin to her students houses just outside the campus. They have lots of cows and calves, goats, hens and chickens and what not. Bunchin just went beserk and was enjoying their company.After a while his excitement got the better of him, and he could not stand, but stand down on the ground and was watching them move about and drinking it all in. He actually patted a small goat and felt thrilled. They were there for an hour and when it was time to leave, of course he would kick up a big fuss. He screamed , he hollered that he wanted to stay there for ever and ever(not yet in words, but in body language, and pitch of his screams!).

Then it was that he would not be bundled alongwith mummy in the baby carrier. He would not be able to see anything. He wanted to sit in the cycle in the luggage carrier at the back! He is just one and a half years old, so that is out of question. But that is not his problem. Then D pacified him by playing some music that he likes on her phone and showing him some butterflies, distracted him and brought him home.

With the result, his head was full of butterflies.She gave him a notebook and a pencil and he was doodling on the pages. Suddenly he shows a portion of the doodle which for him is a butterfly. He cant say 'pattampoochi' yet, so he mimics the flight of a butterfly just like his mom has taught him. He showed me his pattampoochi when he came on skype last evening.His flowing hand movement like a dancer really captured the flight of a butterfly!

D showed me all his art work!. Which was lots of 'kirukkals'. But I am excited !That is the stuff pattis are made of.

Appa my teacher, guide and friend - II

I studied in the same college, that appa was teaching.We also lived inside the college campus. It was a coeducational college.We had studied in girls  school and also pre university in a girls only college. While many a parent had hesitation in admitting their daughters to this college, he would tell them not to worry, trust your girl and things will be fine. He told me when I joined the college, I am a teacher here and we also reside inside the campus. People will notice you and tell me things. I would like that you do what you think is right and tell me what is happening in your life. So I would know anything before somebody gets a bright idea to come and tell me their own version of a tale. I found it was fair. He was anyway my best friend, with whom I used to share my everyday life. So it was no big deal.I have ridden pillion in his cycle many a time to college. Now I think about it, it is amazing that I never wanted to strike out alone and develop a distance from my parents during college days. I think adolescence simply skipped me in my adolescent years!

After my degree he sat down and asked me.What do you want to do now. You can pursue higher studies, you can apply for jobs or you can get married. The last two options were so scary that I decided to do my post graduation, of course in the same college.

When there was a choice to take up insurance company job in Mumbai when I was already an officer in a nationalised bank in the city, he went totally by my wishes. The lure of being in a hostel for six months of training was appealing. He did not put down this wish saying we need to get you married, there is nothing to choose between bank and insurance, you continue here. Any other father of those days would have definitely said that. And the girl would have thought nothing of that wish and followed it through. But he was different. He found my wish very reasonable and said go ahead. Every relative of ours was telling amma(behind his back of course) that they are being stupid.Amma also found my wish quite reasonable and went along with appa. In fact amma was as excited as me to go to Bombay.

When it was time for getting married, again appa showed that he was different, and pro his kids. I said I was not for traditional "girl seeing" ritual. I am not a showpiece I told him. It is very humiliating. He asked me do you have anybody in mind. I said no.Then he said tell me how do we go about finding a boy.I said we can meet in a neutral place, like a temple.(it was not common to meet in CCD as there was not only no CCD, but very few restaurants and fewer where there will be an ambience for calmly sitting down for a chat.They will be crowded and clatter of stainless steel dubara and tumblers and shouting of the tiffin order across the hall). He agreed.  Again somewhere down the lane,he asked me I am also not for any alliance where they make any demands. But just in case, if everything else is perfect, can we bend a little . I said no. He again accepted and went ahead with his search.

Clear, articulate and asks the correct questions and has the correct conversation to the point at the right time.That is appa.And carries it through to the letter and spirit.

......innum varum

appa my teacher, guide and friend

Appa is no more. I was his first  child. I have spent huge chunk of my adolescent life in his company.Surprised? But that is appa. Everyday of my college life, we have gone out for walk together. Well almost everyday, count out one or two days in a year out for some contingencies. Amma has taught me how to live by living it. Appa has taught me how to live by living such a life and also taking the effort and patience to talk to me and guide me and clear my foggy head of all adolescent doubts and fears.

While in school thatha was at home. So it used to be walks with thatha. They were great. But thatha used to be silent most of the time and at other times will just ask me about my day in school and about humdrum everyday life. It used to be very comforting. But with appa it was friendly, intense and enlightening. I have learnt more by listening to him than by reading books.

My athai who was elder to him was living with us. The way he took care of her amazes me today. She was feeling insecure, so he opened a bank account in her name and used to deposit some amounts every month to give her the comfort.She used to carry the passbook proudly in her purse and would every now and then open it and see. He sent her on pilgrimages to places in tamil nadu, when such an opportunity came along. This was 50 years back when such indulgences were not common. She loved those trips in a van with the small group of devotees. She would regale us with the travel stories for days on end. She cannot stand a bus or van ride, so would invariably come back with a headache and nausea and would be laid up for a day.But she had fun.

He told me that you should give. He would show by action and say, see your hand is above. He taught me to do the right thing to the family. He would tell me "how can I be carry on my life when my own siblings are not doing well" .It was that simple. He sent his kanu gift by money order to his sister in the village almost till the end of her life. He would meticulously, every month send the bus fees for his niece in the village. Her father was not keen on her sending her to town for her high school and he took it as his job to see her studies were persued. Thatha once told him ,  that he was forever caring for the extended family, that he is not sure he is saving much. IF something happens to me, will you be able to manage the expenses of his last rites?  Appa took his concern seriously and put in the required amount in a fixed deposit and showed the receipt to thatha. Thatha was aghast. He told him, I was just saying it in passing. You have taken it so much to heart. That is appa. Not for him loose talk and casual comments. He says something, he stands by it, every word. I have acquired that trait from him. I say something I do it.

He was very happy I joined insurance company. He had joined lakshmi insurance company just before independence.He could not continue in delhi in that company as it was very difficult days post partition. Amma and appa came to my office when I took over as chief vigilance officer in an insurance company. It was a proud moment for him.

He taught us the epics by telling the stories when we used to sit around him in the late evenings. He was a good narrator. One of the images which has stuck in my memory is the scene when Rama is facing Ravana in the battlefield. He told us, here was Rama with a apology for an army of monkeys and bears. There was Ravana, the mighty king, with huge army spread over the entire canvas, of chariots, cavalry and hoardes and hoards of infantry. But then, Rama had Dharma with him and that is what mattered. This has shaped who I am. There have been challenging times at work when I have held on to this belief and sailed through successfully.Thanks appa.

He taught us slokas. Mostly those in praise of rama his ishta deivam. He used to help us get the pronounciation right.HE would also explain many a time the meaning of the slokas. So they have stayed with me all these years.

He was a thinker. He would not go by dogmas and rituals, unless he is convinced about them. Ours was a traditional household with modern thinking. He bought a book on hindu wedding rituals and their meaning before my wedding. He gave one copy to my husband and one to me. He said we are going through a traditional hindu wedding, so you both must know what you are doing and asked my husband that he should recite the mantras that the priest will ask him to.  My husband who was not much of a believer, bought into his wish and for the wedding and for the seemandham and ayushhomam of our children, he followed it through.

.... innum varum

Amma's beautiful logic

Amma was asking K if she has finished making dosa. It was ten in the morning. I asked amma, you have  shifted to taking rice meals at 10 in the morning.Then why are you asking about dosa. She said that it is not for her, but for the crow. Crow? why dosa for the crow.She gave a logic which blew my mind away.

She said her food is ready. It is actually carry over food from yesterday. She has asked K to heat it up. But for the crow she cannot give old food. So she is asking that fresh dosa be made. I wanted to slide in a snide remark. Oh, so fresh dosa for the crow.So what is the side dish? She said ghee. Even when she gives fresh rice, the crow will not touch it without ghee. So dosa with ghee, she said.

I persued trying to find some gap in her logic. I said you used to have breakfast in the morning and lunch at one in the afternoon, till recently. Does your crow now come for food at ten? She said my crow is quite adjusting. It was happy for one pm meal and now has shifted to ten am meal!. She had such a beautiful expression on her face as if talking about an indulgent child.

She is unique! I just gave up. But very very happy that I am privileged to be her daughter.

Trip to Thriuvaheendrapuram , tamil nadu

S and me made a day trip to meet an amazing couple in the temple town of Thiruvaheendrapuram, near Cuddalore, Tamilnadu. Their zest and zeal and energy for taking care and running a school for 650 children, totally from donations, is mind blowing. It is all we always wanted to do, but never got around to taking the first step; starting a school for less privileged children and giving it all that we have got.

Let me begin at the beginning. A friend of ours sent me a mail a few weeks ago, recommending a visit to the school this wonderful couple are running, very successfully. He said he has been associated with this school for over 3 years now(the school is 13 years old) and finds it worth being involved in its activities.

So we went there yesterday. I was really shocked to know that the man retired from service 20 years back.He is so energetic and enthusiastic!.His wife who was in charge of home management till then, got involved with starting a school which was his dream come true. She is the correspondent of the school and it was a pleasure to see her manage the affairs with such dedication, enthusiasm and flair. They seem to be eating, breathing and sleeping with only the school in their thoughts and actions.

This is a temple town. Vedanta desikar, a famous Vaishnavaite scholar and devotee has spent over 40 years here. It has the typical  charm of a small  temple town. The couple are deeply devoted and take part round the year in the temple activities including annadhanam.

The children are all quite a happy lot, energetic and with broad smiles. The entire premises was very very neat and the children well groomed. We went round the classes. 10th standard students had come and were allowed to prepare for the mock exam in the afternoon. Though space is a constraint, they were given room to prepare, as most of them would lack good study environment at home. The library was very impressive with books neatly catalogued and easy accessible. They do need more books for very small kids though. A company as part of their CSR had donated latest computers and full furniture for the computer room.Two of the teachers are proficient in computers and so using them well is not going to be an issue I was told. Play equipments were available but since this is exam time, they were kept away in the sports room. Again they have been donated by another company.

We were shown albums of important events that took place in the school and I was able to see them wearing quite colourful and beautiful dresses. I asked the principal how they are able to afford the special costumes. He said the parents will not have money to pay the fees or the bus fees but would be very keen to have their child take part in the school day celebrations.They readily part with the necessary cost for the costumes. They are so proud to see their children don good costumes and are on the stage!

The school is run totally on donations and the children are charged nominally for the school fees and bus fees. Really deserving students are given fee waiver and adjusted from the donations that they receive. Teachers are from nearby areas and are with service mindset. They appeared very enthusiastic and eager to be with the children.

I asked the principal the reason for the children to come to this school, paying fees when they can go to a government school nearby which gives them even noon meal. He said, the children are individually well cared for, and there are lots of value additions and extra curricular and co curricular activities that are being given here, which they lack in a government school. Yoga instructor comes twice a week and children learn yoga. They are taught ramayanam and also take an exam at periodic intervals. They play the bhagavad gita slokas during assembly and I was very happy to see UKG students recite quite a few slokas from the gita.

The school has upto 10th standard and it deserves full kudos for the courage and commitment of the founders and the trustees who are running the school in a very very positive and fulfilling manner.

Bunchin Madras diaries 4

I will continue from my previous blog where I was holding forth on child friendly homes. Door knobs and latches are another serious design faults in houses. As adults we dont even notice where the knobs and latches are.It is usually an involuntary action. But with a toddler, it is a totally different ball game. He is all the time trying to stand on tiptoe and reach anything that is just outside his reach.So it was that he was able to reach the latch which is the horizontal bolting type. D went inside a room and he followed. He saw the latch and wanted to try it out, so reached out and bolted it from the outside. D is calling out to me who was in another room. I heard muffled voices, but I thought D and Bunchin are having a conversation. Usually it is one sided, so I was not paying any attention. Bunchin was perplexed that he could not open the door and be with D. He was watching for developments, as it were. It was after a while that I happen to come there and saw bunchin fiddling near a door and D's voice from inside the room. I was so overcome with anxiety while I opened the door. What if this has happened if another person was not around. And what if Bunchin had got inside the room and bolted it. The latches of any variety have to be at adult level and not at toddler level.Basic safety precaution in designing any house. I had never really looked at it this way, yes, till now. We called the carpenter and got the latch dummied immediately. In an academic campus with majority of young staff, making the quarters child safe should be inbuilt into the construction manual.


AC switches are another danger points. Chennai has to have acs almost throughout the year. A toddler is fascinated by the a slightly more difficult to operate switch there and also the thick wire coming out of it to the stabiliser. Normally we just ask the ac mechanic to fit the switch where there is a convenient place. Never bothering to think a little more and keep it at adult level.

Bedside lamps, so convenient for adults, is so tempting for toddlers. Bunchin used to keep pulling at the wires and switching the light on and off, like in old K  Balachander movies!

We have some ornate mirrors. I was very fascinated by them when I had gone to an exhibition and was very happy to get two for the two bedrooms. But I never paid attention to the way it was fixed to the wall. Now I know when Bunchin pulled at it and it almost came off, because it was only fixed at the top. It is a longish mirror and even otherwise the carpenter should have secured it on both ends. But he did'nt and I had not noticed it for the last more than 20 years. So the lesson learnt is, when we make or buy big wall pieces, secure them on both sides to the wall and only then is it child safe.

Houses having different levels is another big no no. In our house, the verandah is at a lower level, Most of the time the front door is closed so Bunchin is safe. But he gets down the minute the door is opened, and when he was still a little unsure on his feet, it used to give us very anxious moments.

The smooth tiles that are the new standard in all houses, make it impossible to notice any water lying on the floor and the child usually has a skating fall. It is true for adults too, but then most of us walk slowly and cautiously most of the time. But a toddler is in a tearing hurry, and has a nasty fall most of the time. Thatha says why dont you wipe the floor clean when water is spilt. We would only if we know or see! My kids grew up in a house which had red oxide flooring. Extremely child safe!

I had heard this expression many years back. One of our friends in Singapore told us that that weekend they will be busy getting the house child safe.Their child was due soon. I heard it and filed it away, wondering what it was. I was told that they will be checking for good earthing of their electrical wiring and also any exposed switchboards are ground level.

But see, the scope of safety has widened and deepened with Bunchin"s arrival!

Bunchin Madras diaries 3

Our house is  not child friendly. Not by a long margin. We realised it everyday everytime, Bunchin would reach out for a dangerous object. For a starter many switchboards were at ankle level. I dont know what is so fascinating about a switch board but Bunchin has to reach out for it and try to wriggle his tiny fingers in the plug hole. I just dashed across and pulled him out.Out came the tape and the plug was plugged, child safe. I did it while he was watching with total fascination. Immediately he put his fingers and tried to pull it out, the same way he saw me spread it out. He almost succeeded. Then D told me, that it is safe not to do such stuff when he is around. Otherwise he gets ideas and will continuously work on it and give us anxieties. Lesson learned!

We made a wall cabinet some years back with lots of ideas and consultations with all stakeholders!  And it was from ground level. We added pull out draws at the ground level with the thought, " something handy to just push it in.  A temporary storage, we said. But it has become semi permanent storage of all important papers which we are too lazy to file it. We forgot that there would soon be a tiny toddler in the house and this will be his treasure hunt!. We could not tape it shut for obvious reasons, that it was being used several times everyday. So,  Bunchin used to have a field day pulling it out, sitting down comfortably and rummaging the contents. If he is quiet for a while, you can be sure he is at this spot. What did I say , our house is not child friendly. No, a small correction. Looking at it from Bunchin's viewpoint, it is totally child friendly. Everything is within his reach!

We bought a corner table, just to keep bunchin's stuff handy near the staircase landing. But then it had soon metamorphosised into the mobile and tablet charging point. Bunchin will climb the stairs in a jiffy and immediately he has his hands full, pulling at all the esoteric electronic stuff. Thatha is amused at all other times with Bunchin's 'vishamam' but his mobile and his tablet are sacred for him. So Bunchin is soon thwarted.He need not worry some other child friendly stuff will be quite near.The room has a corner  table with two pull out draws. Again it has all odds and ends of unclassified nature, many of them were lost and found objects. But they were not child friendly objects. Many of them were breakable items, some with sharp edges and some with wires sticking out. So they were taped when Bunchin was busy fiddling with some other stuff in another room.

The washing machine. It is a front loading one and he is fascinated by what is happening inside.Colourful(and dirty) clothes are making various movements and he is seeing and not able to handle them.So he tries the knob and they are just within his reach. Why can they not have the knobs in a panel on the top!Atleast they can make the front loading door opaque! Korean manufacturers should wear Edward de bono's thinking hats!

Kitchen is of course his ultimate playground. Here we are a little more relaxed. Everything is stored within his reach in small containers. And unbreakable variety. So he can pull anything out and fool around with them or the vessels. It is only a nuisance to clear them away, but he is safe. See, kitchen is the most child safe place in our house. And it was a shock to me when western magazines tell us not to encourage a toddler inside a kitchen as it is quite a dangerous place. East is east and west is west!

The clothes cupboard and its contents used to fascinate him for a while. He would pull out the just washed clothes from my cupboard, again sitting down comfortably on the floor. I made a game of it. I would fold and play act as though I am ironing it. He was happy that he can play a game pulling out things. This went on for a while.Till one day, he pulled out every single cloth in the last three shelves and it filled the entire room.  I was not very amused and after that he lost interest in this silly game!

Bathrooms fascinate him. Especially the taps and the western toilets. D is not at all amused as the taps are within his reach and he drenches himself thoroughly. Good that chennai has a weather where such childish pranks do not have very serious repurcussions most of the time. Plumbers should realise that every house will have toddlers sometimes and it is best to have taps at an 'adult' level!.

Let me not get started on door stoppers. He easily pulls out the floor level ones. What happened to the good old rectangular woodden ones at our shoulder level which will keep the door shut. D came out with an innovation to keep a thick towel hanging on the door, so that Bunchin is not able to shut the door completely and hurt himself in the bargain. Carpenters, please go back to old fashioned door stoppers.

........more to go

Chiku aka bunchin: madras diaries 2

Bunchin is a mofussil guy; and that too from a sheltered academic campus. A double whammy. He has seen lots of cycles and tricycles; a few two wheelers and a few cars. Yes, take in a few campus buses and that's it. He goes for a morning walk riding on his appa's shoulders and in an hour he would spot about ten vehicles, all put together. He will watch them with fascination from the time he sees them in the horizon till the time they cross him and disappear in the next road bend. He would meet quite a few walkers and would meticulously give a wide grin, stop by and exchange pleasantries!Yes, they would smile and stop and talk to his appa, while he continues to smile at them. And the most happening place is the market area, which houses a dozen shops selling all that the community in the campus will need. He likes his mom taking him there.There is lot of buzz, smells and sounds and activity and he thrives on the chaos.

Now catapult  him into Madras or Chennai,whatever. Our house which was in a cul de sac and way beyond mylapore,  which for us was chennai then , has now become a happening place. He gets out of the house and cannot go jaywalking. He has to be bundled into a car.The windows have to be pulled up, so that he is not inhaling polluted air. There are buses and lorries and cars and autos and two wheelers whizzing past him every second. He is just not able to process them in his busy head. He feels cramped and fiddles non stop with the door handle. He is happy to be let out into the sand in the beach nearby or in the park. He has fun running around.

There is a small park near our place which has been recently opened. We took him there. It was well laid out with greenery and a walkers path. But nothing to interest a toddler. He immediately shot out on to the road, where lots of activity was happening. Thankfully a good footpath has been laid, so thatha had to run with him to keep him safe on the pavement. It was late evening and for the first time he was seeing the lights and sounds of a buzzing metropolis. He was excited beyond belief and when thatha took him in his arms he was very happy, so he got a ringside view of all the shops with neon and psychedelic lights.

The same excitement was repeated when we took him to the beach on a late evening. The vendors, the sounds, the hectic crowd busy  inhaling all the pure air that is still left there. He ran faster than his tiny legs could carry him, much to the amusement of other pavement walkers and idlers on the beach. Of course, he had to fall down and hurt himself a little. That helped us call it a day and head back home.

We took him to the Guindy children's park. We are visiting the place after atleast 30 years! It has been well kept and bunchin went berserk just stepping inside the park. The huge open space and lots and lots of children and adults gave him a tremendous high!He ran all over the place. And we like true adults wanted to show him the deers, the monkeys, the ducks and what not. He would take one look and then run away. He only took a cursory interest in the monkeys which were doing lots of jumping and running inside the enclosure. It helped us show him monkeys in the picture book and  how they jump.In turn his feeding time was more smooth for a few days thereafter looking at the picture book and making up stories of animals in the guindy park.

A friend of mine recommended a park in mrc nagar. So we took bunchin one saturday. The park was deserted but had a good number of swings and slides and see saws and all in very good condition. The sandpit was also very clean. I also was quite excited and we were both running around trying one thing after another. Just when we had our fill and we deciding to leave and come another day, a swarm of bees came from nowhere and stung me and bunchin. Thatha escaped! Bunchin and me kept up a good crescendo all the way in the car to chitti's place. Bees 'sting really stings! And after applying ice and calming him down a bit, normalcy was sort of restored. But no, no more visits to mrc nagar park. You can have the best hardware, but you dont know to mind your bees!
 You will not have bunchin stepping into your sandpit again, for a while, atleast!

Chiku is now Bunchin!! Madras diaries 1

When and how Chiku came to be called Bunchin is not clearly chronicled in our family history book! Though Chiku he was much before he was born, after 9th september 2014, we came to call him anything which caught our fancy at that time. Recently I have been calling him Gaddu and Kannu and Dadiya   D has been calling him Bunchin . She somehow felt Bunchin sticks to him very well because, yes, he looks so bunchin!! So he will be officially referred to as Bunchin, till the next name change..By the way today D asks him Dadiya yaaru(who is dadiya) and he gives a wide grin and pats his chest!!

It has been ages since I posted. Almost 4 months. I have been very very busy with Bunchin all this time. It is not only the time that you are with him.Even when he is sleeping or with D, he totally fills your mind space that there is pretty little room for anything else. I keep telling my friends who ask me about being invisible and unheard for weeks on end ,that my mind is so full of Bunchin that everything else just ceases to exist. I remember a tamil film song " ulagam surungude, nam iruvaril adangude. I think it was  a surya, asin starrer film. ( World has shrunk and it has only the two of us).
It was a very very novel and beautiful experience for me. So totally absorbed by that tiny infant.

How is he now? Well, he is running around a lot, can come down all by himself if we prop him on a smallish slide in a park. When you let go of your hands, the thrill and excitement on his face is a treat.The face and evey single part of it bursts forth as though like a flower for those few seconds.It is pure bliss for him and for us who are privileged to catch those moments. I try best not to dwell on such moments, as the idea of 'kann' is very deeply ingrained in our Indian psyche.

He sits on the beach sands and is very happy allowing the sand to run through his fingers and more importantly throw it in the air and laugh aloud. Yes, lots of it comes back in the breeze and sits on his head and all over his body. I tried to sit against the breeze, so that the sand does not come back to us. But then before you realise, he has repositioned himself to have the sand directly come back at him!..


He is fascinated by the large number of dogs and crows that throng the besant nagar beach. Thankfully when we go there in the mornings, the dogs are all fast asleep. So he goes near every one of them and says 'ummm hmmm(it is bow wow if you are ignorant of baby talk) and tries to coax them to wake up and be up and about. But they lie there peacefully. I use the chance to sneak a point across. I tell him all dogs are sleeping. So bunchin also should sleep. He leaves the second part conveniently and slants his head and puts his palms near his ears and show  me as though he is sleeping. But then he wont shut his eyes, but I have to shut my eyes. How do you like the dual play?

He can climb the staircase in just a second, I kid you not. You would have just turned your head to hear something and you cant see him. He is at the top of the stairs and gives you a heart attack, what if he turns back and slides and falls down.The scenario is repeated  umpteen times everyday. Then you may ask, why do you turn your head for a second when he is around. Yes, It is a very good question. Mostly he climbs the stairs not for anything in particular that he wants to do in the first floor, but because, yes, it is there, and so tempting. See I can climb up so fast, so easily. The minute he is at the top of the stairs, he wants to come down. No yoga, no walk or exercise necessary. D calls him her gym instructor! Well said D , you have never mentioned a truer word!

Well there is lots more

Just catching my breath for my next post!