Navarathiri

I spent quite a few days during dussera in Bangalore. I enjoyed every minute of it. It was also a highly social event. I was amazed once more at the thoughtfulness of weaving such varied festivals into our lives.
Our apartment complex has evolved a wonderful system for all the nine days of dussera. The housemates take turns in inviting others to their house for haldi kumkum. It is usually preceeded by lalitha sahasranam recitation. So more than 40 odd women and children land up in each house by 6 pm. They are all dressed in their fineries and the entire place looks like a tapestry of latest fashion and design. The deity is usually very well decorated.The artistic tastes of the lady is fully brought out. I have seen very many decorative items in all these pujas. I invariably stay back and ask the lady, where to get these items. The recitation starts. Most of them are veterans and can reel of all the 1000 names without batting an eyelid. It was a first occasion so I was mostly groping. There is something about chanting, especially when you have a very enthusiastic and religious group. I closed my eyes on the first day and just allowed the resonance of the sound to flow over me. It was really very unique and soul satisfying.
Chanting over and a few of the ladies break out into some bhajans/songs. Then there is 'aarti' and distribution of prasad. We had almost a full meal in some houses.Prasad items were neatly packed in disposable cups/trays.We had porul vilangai urundai as prasad in my neighbour's house! I remembered my athai who used to visit us used to bring this sweet.I still remember the unique taste and texture!
Then the haldi kumkum. I had enough cocoanuts to feed an entire village!
Then the ladies stayed back for a chat and exchange of news.The kiddos had a field day playing and fooling around.
Then we trooped to another flat to see 'kolu'. I saw new sets of toys and new themes. Well, old themes but I am seeing them as made into dolls for the first time. Narasimhar coming out of the pillar; wedding set, including an entire 'pandhi' of people having their meals; partha sarathy perumal veedi purappadu; tirupati brahmotsavam including the seven hills and the winding mountain path; lanka and asoka vanam and sita and hanuman and karthigai pengal. I saw chettiar and chettichi sitting pretty on plastic chairs.I asked the lady of the house and she told me, they cannot sit on the floor as they have arthritis!
I have got to know quite a few families during this season and quite intimately at that. That is the purpose of these festivals, I guess. One elderly lady, about 80 years old sang a beautiful carnatic song and bowled me over how she was able to hold her breadth.
Navarathiri festival is my favourite. It is spread over nine full days and helps us to phase out our activities. It is suffused with religious feelings.For the pious, it is kalasam and pooja in the mornings.Elaborate naivedhyam preparations for the culinary experts! For the artistically inclined it provides endless scope for experimenting and enjoying keeping the kolu dolls . For the musically inclined, it is a time to bring forth all of ones talents and also listen to others who are as well endowed. For those interested in dressing well, again this festival offers immense scope.You can dress up and also elaborately dress up your dolls on display!
Again for busy people who are not able to keep up with friends/relatives/neighbours, this gives a capsule course to get in touch and that too in such an enjoyable way!

South Indian weddings-

There was a wedding in a friend's family and I had spent two enjoyable days last weekend. Two full days of attending a wedding, is something I have not done for many many years. More so, remaining up and about and raring to share with aam jan.

No, I did not feel obliged to attend the same. It was purely voluntary. I was not obliged to stay almost all the 48 hours.It happened naturally. It was like magic, that all the stuff I have grown to dislike in weddings, had vamoosed without a trace and all that I like and look forward to, were there in plenty. How did that happen?

Well for one, today South Indian weddings have metamorphasised, incorporating the 'fun' stuff from other styles and also reinventing and enjoying the traditional aspects.It is also that the families and the bride and groom are well educated on what they are going through and bring a certain amount of seriousness and purposefulness about the religious part. Nobody was distracted or worse still secretly hurrying the priest to get it over and done with. No,let me not jump the gun.

Day 1 started fairly early with both the bride and the groom, sitting pretty on the dias, but huddled together in separate area with their respective parents. The parents were dressed in traditional attire; it brings a certain seriousness and auspiciousness to the occasion, I dare say.We talk of dress code in corporate world, so there are dress codes for social occasions too!

The bridegroom was doing 'vratham' and the girl was being initiated into 'jatakathi, namakathi' ceremonies. The mood was subdued and lowkey, as the families were coming together for the first time, and the first salvo has been fired for the wedding ceremonies.

Family members and close friends were present, so it was a time for introductions and touching base with people whom you had known long long ago. No nadaswaram this time, so no background noise to overcome.

Post lunch had a very enjoyable time as we were witness to a variety entertainment programme by the children.It was not a amateur affair, but well thought out and planned.The kids were huddled in practise sessions since morning.It helped to bring the two families together under congenial environment. Mothers and fathers presented a different aspect of their personality by going on stage and singing old melodies, really old ones, like 'maapillai doi', and enjoying every moment of it.

Evening was the 'mapillai azhaippu' and the temple was just behind the wedding hall, in the same complex. While the groom's party was stepping into the hall, all of a sudden, the nadaswaram came up belting popular wedding songs.Otherwise sober uncles and aunts suddenly got into the fray and were shaking a leg! I was never more astonished. This was the first time that I have seen elders enjoying a wedding in this way.Then the nieces and nephews also got into the mood and nadaswaram was playing a 'rap' song. I was busy trying to capture all the action on my video.

The 'nichyathartham' itself was quite a grand affair, with the dias filled with all the 'perusu' from both parties.It was like a 'sadas' , all serious to witness the engagement ceremony. The usual exchange of thamboolam and reading the 'pathirikai' was gone through.

The next day started fairly early as the muhurtham was between 7.30 to 9 am. So the run up to the muhurtham has to start by 6 am. There was the oonjal and the songs routine.(Actually I got in late, so missed the fun part!)

The hall was filling up fast, as it was a Sunday and invitees wanted to be there for the muhurtham.The bride, otherwise a fussy girl, was going through the routine of changing sarees every half an hour without batting an eyelid and changing hairdo and accessories to go with it!Quite a feat! But then you have a resident beautician with you and you have to just leave the entire operation to her!Now, the thavil and nadaswaram got into high crescendo and one had to raise ones voice to be heard. The gear was shifting and that was the signal that I need to perch myself on a chair to capture the 'finale'.The couple were by now in a 'padma vyuha' circled by the parents, sisters in law as the chief operations persons, and all relatives and friends wanting a piece of the action. None can enter now , the place was sealed.

Mangalya dharanam was completed and there was a visible sigh of relief all around and the crowd dispersed from the dias and the couple were left to do the sapthapadi with ease and peace and quiet.

Now the parents were freed and they went around the marriage hall, greeting the guests and big smiles plastered on their faces.They have been promoted as mother in laws and father in laws!

Post lunch after a little lull, was the 'nalangu' scheduled. Papads were arranged and also the haldi kumkum. It was lot of fun with good singing from anybody and everybody who was in the mood.

Breaking of papads on the heads of the couple is the climax!It is usual nowadays to rubbish this as being too childish. But then some loosening has to take place for two families to feel comfortable with each other. And nalangu performs that function. Defreezing we used to call in our corporate training sessions, remember?

The reception was a simple affair, with the only object of meeting the guests and taking 'attendance' with them (video and photograph sessions with every group).It is somewhat boring, but not for the invitees. Thankfully it was a short affair, as most of the guests had come in the morning, and only 'office crowd' had come in the evening reception.

The videographer/photographer were getting into the 'portrait' mode and were asking for 'special poses'. I liked the one when the parents sat on the decorated sofas and the couple sat perched on the armrests!

The dinner was a buffet with assorted tents serving variety of dishes. This has become the norm these days.

The two days were coming to a close and what remained in my memory, is the happy faces, the family and friends pitching in with all the work and running around without any hitch, the wedding having the correct share of religious rituals taken seriously and also having room for enjoyment.

Yes, south Indian weddings like English language has become richer for amalgamating the 'mehendi', baraat and dancing, reinventing nalangu and adding a dose of variety entertainment, while retaining the serious tenor and purpose of the wedding event.